Walking into the doors of Lakeland High School (LHS) for the first time, not knowing what to expect and not knowing what will happen, was one of the most anxiety-inducing, yet exciting moments of my life.
As a freshman, I was timid to walk the hallways and scared to get lost in the building. I was always so amazed by the seniors and thought they were so cool. I would constantly wish for the day my graduation came and I was done with school.
Now sitting here writing this in my last class of high school ever, that wish seems a bit silly. While I am ready to graduate and move on to bigger and better things, a lot of goodbyes, nostalgia, and stress have come with this year and graduation.
Some of the most amazing people that have come into my life are preparing to leave this town behind and move far away. Along with that, some of the hobbies that I have stuck with my whole life have come to an end, and the realization that adulthood has finally struck has been brought to light. The stress of trying to find out where to go, what to do, and how to do it.
While I may have it all figured out at the moment, we never truly know what will happen next.
A quote I recently heard from a friend’s teacher’s graduation speech has stuck with me and has been repeated in the back of my mind as I finish out this last week of school.
“The last 12 years you have been in school, you have been calm and collected because you know what to expect in the future, but this year your feelings change because, for once, you do not know and you fear the unknown.”
It is such an odd concept to think about. Everyone is moving away and entering various fields all over the world. The kids we grew up with are now leaving and moving on to a different part of their lives.
Things like moving out of my parents’ house, paying bills, getting a “real job”, etc. It all feels like a fever dream.
“I am moving out in the winter and thinking about that is a bit nerve racking. It feels like we just started school yesterday and now I am on my own,” Callum Coffey said.
This time of the year I hate the most because this time of the year is when everyone tends to reflect back on their memories with the seniors. While I am a total fool for nostalgia, it does hit a bit differently when you are the senior.
For 3 years, I have sat at a graduation and watched as some of my favorite people cross the stage and get their diplomas. I have watched many graduation slideshows and clapped for many of my friends.
Now, as a senior graduating myself, it hits differently to relive different memories with people. While it is sweet and fun to look back on, it is almost hurtful knowing that we may never be that close again. The worst part of all of these feelings that come with graduation, though, is the feeling of missing the moment you are currently in.
“This time of year always feels so unrealistic because it is like these people you have known half your life or more are moving on and suddenly just ‘disappearing’,” Coffey said.
Many will understand what I mean; it is an odd feeling for sure, and there are not many words to explain it, but being somewhere at a moment in time and already missing it while it is happening is something I never knew even existed.
There have been many moments like this where I tend to be missing a moment that is currently happening and wishing for it to slow down or freeze in time, but it never does.
An example that comes to mind of this is any moment with my best friend, Rebekah “Bekah” Lewis.
Bekah and I have been friends since the 7th grade, and we have been inseparable since. She helped get me through high school and everything else that has gone on in my life. She is one of the many people I unfortunately have to say goodbye to at the end of this month.
Any moment spent with Bekah these last couple of weeks has included a wave of sadness knowing that we are running out of time. As we promised to stay in contact and visit each other while our lives go in completely different directions, it is hard to think that we will not live 15 minutes away from each other anymore, but a whole 1371 miles.
The realization has finally hit us that we are leaving, and this is happening, and while it is sad to say goodbye to one another, it is also a happy moment of “we did it.”
“I am excited to be living in California and pursuing what I love, but so far leaving all my friends behind has been the hardest part and the most draining thing,” Rebekah Lewis said.
Leaving friendships like this behind is one of the worst parts of the graduation process, but with the things I have learned in the last four years, one fits perfectly into this situation, which is that everything is temporary.
While it may sound a little weird, it is the truth of high school. Everything here is temporary: students, teachers, friends, classes, time, etc.
I have learned many things throughout my last four years of high school, such as how fast it goes when you have fun, to live in the moment, not to worry so much, not to let fear stop you from doing what you want, and not to take a moment for granted.
I learned all of this through teachers, friends, administrators, and even other classmates. While it may not have been in a lecture or a book we read in class, it is something I picked up throughout the years and something I think about as I leave.
“I like flowers because it shows you that everything is temporary. You get flowers and they are beautiful to look at but eventually they end up dying, and that is what reminds me that everything in life is temporary,” Brian Williams, teacher at LHS, said.
Ever since he told us this the first day of freshman year in Athletic Conditioning class I have gotten him flowers at the end of every school year for the last four years.
It is small stuff like that I will miss doing or even just the small conversations Mr. Williams and I would have.
I am excited to finally go and move on. I have been saying this since my freshman year, and while I sit here now reminiscing and talking about how it is sad, I will admit that I am ready to graduate, and I am more excited than sad.
I have done everything I wanted to these last four years, and I can not wait to see what I will do in the future. I have had the combination of the worst and best times of high school, as I feel most high schoolers do, and I can confidently say that crossing that stage, I will have little to no regrets.
I made many friends along the way, but I also lost many along the way. I learned various things about who I was and what I wanted to be, and I even learned a great deal about others.
I met so many teachers who pushed me to be the best I could and who never gave up on me, even when I gave them a list of excuses or a little bit of lip.
One of the teachers, in particular, who saw my potential and pushed me to be my best was Michael Dunn.
I came to Dunn’s class sophomore year as a regular English student. Being the stupid sophomore I was, I slacked off in his class the first semester and only got a good grade because I did all my work at the end of the semester and was blessed with my mother’s writing skills. Dunn noticed this and pushed me harder in the second semester, making it so that I could not “just get by,”. While I complained and made up every excuse in the book, he knew I was a better student than that and did not give up on me and let me slip up.
Later on, when I started to do better in the class and became more efficient as an overall student, he asked me to join journalism, and I decided it would be a fun thing to do. He constantly got on me and pushed me in that class, as well. I truly believe without him, I would not have gotten my “writer of the year” award this year, and I would not be where I am now.
I made good bonds with many teachers, and I will miss them all when I leave, but I want to say thank you to the teachers I have had who did not just make me a better student but also a better person.
I also want to thank all of my friends throughout the years who taught me life lessons that will stick with me forever, good or bad.
I had an enjoyable four years at this school, and although it went quickly, I am ready to say goodbye and move on to the next chapter of my life.
After graduating on Wednesday, I plan to go to school to study Diagnostic Medical Sonography and get my degree to become an Ultrasound Technician. I have been interested in medicine since I was a kid, and once I saw and researched this field, that it was perfect for me.
Many of my friends have big plans, and while we all scatter across the country and move on, we prepare ourselves for the final goodbyes and to watch each other’s lives in pictures like we used to watch each other grow.
I am not sad about it ending, though. I am happy for them and can not wait to see what they do in the future.
So, to finish off my final journalism article for the Lakeland Hawkeye, and my final goodbyes to Lakeland High School. The last thing I have to say, in the famous words of Phoebe Bridgers, is;
“Anyway, don’t be a stranger.”
